“So, this is Easter .. and what have you done..?”*

I’ll tell you what I’ve done. Lots of studying, the occasional bit of sewing, and BUGGER ALL BLOGGING.

It’s over a month since my last blog post and, given I’m writing this on Easter Sunday, it feels appropriate that in my head I’ve just said this sentence in some damn confession box.

(Will I go to hell for prefixing ‘confession box’ with ‘damn’? PROBABLY)

It’s not that I haven’t been sewing, or that I haven’t been at my computer. It’s just that each time I’ve done either of these activities, I’ve been rushing for a deadline for something ELSE.

I’ve tried (and failed) to juggle half-a-dozen online courses since the beginning of the year, and sewed two things for deadlines too, and .. well, something had to give. Mostly my health *shout out to my posse who STILL has the same cough ‘n’ cold/been ill since Christmas 2015* but also things like writing ‘n’ shizz. On a good day with a fair wind behind me, I’d categorise myself as a writer. If I did that right now, I’d have Trading Standards on my case, mate.

As misery likes company, I’m not sure if I’m happy or sad to know that I’m not the only one whose sewing and blogging have had to take a back seat due to illness; my Saturday morning routine hasn’t been the same since my favourite-ever sewing blogger, Melissa of Fehrtrade.com, has been too ill to sew and post much this year *sad-face at lack of blog-post round-ups*.

I’ll need to go through my camera to catch up with further outstanding items to be a-blogged about but, as it’s Easter, I figured I’d start with my latest; an ickle bunny rabbit.

Two good friends have done the reproductive thing and have brought a new Very Small Human into the world. Since they’re Very Fine People, their Very Small Human deserves a handmade gift of some sort.

Since baby clothes are fine for about a month before the Very Small Human starts being Slightly Less of a Very Small Human And Thus Unable to Fit Into Aforementioned Very Small Human outfit, I figured a toy would be the best way to go.

Luckily, I had a pattern on hand, people. Published in 1978 (which makes it older than the parents of said Very Small Etc), and picked up in a charity shop years ago when my presence of mind anticipated the appearance of Small Humans, it’s not a bad little number;

Look at that day-glo colouring! Look at that luminous faux-fur! Look! LOOK!

As I’m the sort who takes flipping AGES to think something through and then finally takes action right up against a deadline, I spent a long time going through my fabric stash, pondering fabric combinations.

(I decided against the day-glo faux-fur for reasons which I’m not fully able to fathom.)

I didn’t want anything too ‘girly’; by which I mean PINK, basically. When did everything become so damn gendered by colour? I HATED pink with the kind of passion you’d suspect would rupture such a tiny frame as the Small Human I was myself; I liked bright red, bright blue, my first ever toy car was in a fantastic dark metallic green *totally non-gender-binary face*, I wasn’t some ‘little princess’, I was generally agreed to be the third-toughest kid in my year when I was about nine years old FFS-

*Breathes into paper bag; rant subsides*

So yeah. Umm. Making it suitable for a little girl WITHOUT it looking obviously suitable for a little girl. So I did the standard thing; I combined opposites. I teamed a cool, neutral beige needlecord with some off-white Japanese spriggy cotton in a red flower print (backed with plain white cotton to keep the colours crisp and to lend extra strength to the ‘fashion’ fabric).

So far, so Scandi cool. Right?

Then I had a panic. The pattern says ‘Cuddly Toys for Toddlers’, not ‘Cuddly Toys for Very New and Small Humans’ and two words flooded my amygdala with fear: CHOKING HAZARD.

Therefore the tail isn’t a wool pom-pom, but a white cotton needlecord ball filled with toy stuffing and sewn in with enough thread to tow a small hatchback.

And it doesn’t have any eyes, because the felt ones the pattern prescribed looked SHIT (and could be a #chokinghazard) and the only good-looking alternative was a pair of wooden buttons (#chokinghazardandguaranteeddeathwithinathreemileradiusfortheunderfives). But hey, it looks TOTALLY cool and worthy of Kinfolk or some such like this, right??

(I’m really playing up the Scandi Cool thing up to the HILT with this one, as over-compensation…)

On the downside, the rabbit can’t see where it’s going. Although, given those ears which are just MADE for going into a Very Small Human’s mouth, I suspect it’s an act of mercy on my part for the unsuspecting bunny. Besides, VSH’s mum is a veterinarian, so I’m sure she’ll come up with a kick-ass way to explain the bunny’s lack of eyes when the little girl asks .. that, and I’m happy to sew on eyes when the risk of #chokinghazard subsides in a couple of years’ time.

(Will that freak out the Small Human? And if so, is that even more reason to do it?)

So there we go. One toy rabbit. No idea if its recipients like it yet, as going to speak to them tonight (and there’s a chance it may not have even turned up in the post yet; oh God, poor, blind, trapped bunny!) but I’ve shown pictures to two adults so far; one wants to commission one for his son, and another wants one for her own birthday.

Both have requested that theirs have eyes. THE WEIRDOS.

Happy Easter!

*With apologies to fans of John Lennon for the paraphrasing